Seriously, how hard can it be for someone to look at an account that reads, "X Middlename Surname," and a document that reads, "Xyzabc Middlename Surname," and not understand that they are the exact same person, who goes by their first initial and full middle name rather than a full first name and middle initial?
I am SO tired of having this fight. When I get mail, or pick up money transfers, or sign credit card receipts, or what-the-fuck ever, I do it with my first initial and middle name. As far as I know, it's not illegal (or some US presidents, among other people, would have some 'splaining to do). I'm obviously not trying to defraud anyone, particularly if I can hand them an ID that has the FULL THREE NAMES on it. It's not even a nickname, I just USE MY MIDDLE NAME INSTEAD OF MY FIRST NAME, because I don't want everyone in the world knowing a name I can't stand the sound or sight of.
Ten fucking years, probably, I've had this Paypal account, with the X Middlename Surname format on it the entire time, and only now has it become a problem, because they didn't have a couple of pieces of information and needed to see proof of identity. I'm verified, I have credit cards on file, and my address is confirmed, but because there are four extra letters on my ID card, that's no longer good enough. If all I had on there was my first name and last name, and they got a card with three names, would they want all three on the account then? Or if I had my first name, middle initial, and last name? So what the shit is the problem with first initial, middle name, last name? You have every other piece of my legal information right in front of you, you can connect them to me, so why the hell does everyone I'm doing monies with need to be able to see a name I don't use and wouldn't be recognized by (and that I have worked VERY hard to keep from getting out because I associate the name in question with the worst times in my life, and quite honestly live in fear of someone finding said name out and using it purely because it will hurt me).
I want to change it, but my mom gives me such shit about it. She's said before that she'd worry it would mess up my SSI if I did, and when I said tonight, "I know you feel that way, but I have to do it, because I can't keep going on with the name I have now," she got SO - I don't know if 'offended' is the right word, but her response was basically, "Oh? And do you have hundreds of dollars to change it with? You can do whatever you want when it's your money. So what are you going to change it to?" (In that kind of tone that comes off as, "You'll never have that kind of money and you'll never go through with it, so why are you being stupid?") I can't even find information for changing a name in this county - I can find it for the state, and for other counties, but not for ours. There county court website doesn't have the forms or any informartion on filing fees (for that specifically - I can find them for other things). I don't know if she'd help me even if I did have the money - it's two trips to court, a notary, publishing in the paper, and then having to update all the documents with Social Security and the DMV and I don't even know where else. I told C if I ever did come out there, I was changing it then, and he laughed, but at least he'd do it.
I just...I want it off me. It's not who I am, and so many of the people I hang around with now don't understand that - They think that knowing a 'real' name instead of an online name shows that you're being the real person, not a persona, but for me it's exactly the opposite. It's the names I give myself that are real, and my 'real' name that's empty and fake.