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Written for Porn Battle IX.

Bad Celebrity Influence
Marvel. Teddy Altman/Billy Kaplan/Tony Stark. Steve Rogers/Tony Stark implied. NC-17. ~2500 words. Shapeshifting.
That sex tape was never going to be the same.

Bad Celebrity Influence

They'd made it to a charity event or two in the past but Billy wasn't used to this sort of celebrity. Teddy wasn't either judging by the shade of green he kept slipping in to. The guests at this gala were so out of their league it'd been torture trying to hold a smile and not sweat like a sprinkler. For the past two hours Billy had threatened to start chanting a spell to get them both the hell out of Dodge. Teddy pointed out that escape the old fashioned way would be a lot easier and eventually they'd been able to drop the smiles long enough to make a run for it.

They were pretty successful until a wrong turn landed them in a guest bedroom that was bigger than the entire apartment he lived in. A voice purred out of the darkness, stopping them dead in their tracks. "If you two are trying to ditch the fun, you're going the wrong way."

Billy's eyes adjusted in time to see Tony Stark rise from a huge bed. He looked rumpled, Billy noticed, and of course he would because the bed was in no better shape. A pair of hands had clearly gotten friendly with his hair and his shirt hung open all the way down the front. "If you're looking for fun, you just found it."

Somehow with all the eyecandy, Billy managed words. "Sorry, Mr. Stark," he said, and prayed his voice wouldn't crack, "we just took a wrong turn."

"And here I thought you two had come to rescue me from the utter disaster that was the past half hour of my life." Tony moved towards them, and Billy glanced at Teddy. They couldn't just leave without excusing themselves.

Teddy held up a hand and shifted with an obvious intend to hustle them back out the door. "Mr. Stark, we're sorry, we didn't mean to intrude."

Billy nodded in agreement, but Tony hardly seemed to register the apology or the body language that came with it, and he'd crossed the room before Teddy could say another word. His shirt peeled wide open as he dropped a hand on each of their shoulders, and Billy knew he wasn't the only one who couldn't help but stare. Tony grinned like he knew it. "Stay a while, have a drink."

"We're not old enough to drink," Billy said.

"But you're legal for everything else, right?" Tony said, and Billy looked at the ceiling, then the floor, then anywhere else to avoid paying any more attention to the fact that Tony had a really, really nice chest. Like a leaner but equally ripped version of Teddy's, with totally edible pecs and an enticing sprinkle of dark hair that ran down towards his navel—and holy fuck, they were being hit on by Iron Man.

Billy's gaze was still stuck a few inches south of Tony's navel and he only felt Teddy glance down at him. "Well-" Teddy said, and Billy noticed that it sounded more like a maybe we are than an we've really gotta go.

"Did I hear a yes? I think I did." One of Tony's hands slid from Billy's right shoulder to all the way to his left, and he watched as the same happened to Teddy. Tony put his mouth near Teddy's ear while his gaze slid over to Billy. Teddy had gone green from his hairline to his toes, and the high flush in his cheeks clashed something horrible. Billy was pretty sure he didn't have enough blood left above the waist to manage a blush of his own.

"Was that a yes?" Tony whispered, his mouth staying open like a tease. Billy saw Teddy's throat bob and then two pairs of eyes were looking his way like it was all up to him.

"We've, uh, never. I mean, we've talked about it, sure," Billy stammered. They'd talked about it a lot to be honest, but the reality staring him in the face was a little daunting.

"You're only young once, usually," Tony said, and while Billy just stared, he put his mouth even closer to Teddy's ear and whispered something that Billy couldn't hear over the sudden resurgence of blood roaring through his head. Whatever it was got a slight nod out of Teddy, a wicked grin from Tony that was even sharper than the edges of his goatee, and then he found the arm around his shoulder curling him closer into one of the hottest kisses ever. Tony's tongue slid straight into his mouth and transformed a completely humiliating squawk into a moan that Tony echoed right back. The moan hooked straight into Billy's guts and he found himself melting like the main character of a romance novel. He was fucking being kissed by Iron Man.

"That was definitely a yes," Tony said, pulling away.

Dazed, Billy licked his lips and opened his eyes in time to catch the second half of what was, no question, the actual hottest kiss ever. Teddy's blush had faded and Tony worked his mouth against Teddy's with a slow thoroughness that was making Billy blush instead. The soft flash of Tony's tongue licking against Teddy's hit Billy's gut in the exact same spot with a hot spike of lust. He moaned and prayed the sudden wobbliness in his legs wasn't going to turn into a full-out swoon.

He watched Tony pull away only to surge back and claim one more hasty kiss from Teddy. "Let's move this to the bed," Tony said, manoeuvring them around and giving the both of them a gentle shove towards the rumpled mess of it. He went to close the doors and Billy pulled Teddy into a hasty huddle.

"Is this really happening?" Billy looked up at Teddy, pretty sure his eyes were as big as the tent in his pants. "Are we really going to do this?"

Teddy shrugged his shoulders and tossed a glance to Tony, who simply arched a brow and leaned against a sideboard that could probably get Billy through a couple years of college. By the look of it, he was just counting down the seconds until they decided in his favour.

"I'm up for it," Teddy said, dipping down to slide his mouth over Billy's. As the kiss slowed and they parted, Teddy rested his forehead against Billy's. "You?"

"Holy shit, am I."

"Well," Tony said, sliding right back in between them, "that's two votes yea, motion approved. Let's get this party going." He wasted no time in physically herding them towards the bed. Somewhere in the dozen paces there he managed to get Billy's tie loosened, his shirt untucked, and his belt slid out of the loops.

"It's a skill," Tony said, catching Billy's astonished look. He tumbled into the bed without looking and yanked Billy down right between the wide sprawl of his legs. Billy craned around to look him in the eye as Tony's arms wrapped around to his front and got to work on getting his shirt all the way off. "C'mon, big guy," he said, and Billy felt Tony's gaze burn straight past him to where Teddy hovered at the edge of the mattress. "Give me a hand, and while you're at it, how about you do your thing and make my dreams come true."

"What do you mean?"

"Oh, I think you know what I mean, but in case it's not obvious that I'm utterly self-absorbed and would fuck my reflection if I could, what I'd like is for you," Tony ran a hand down Billy's chest and deftly undid his pants one-handed, "to shapeshift into me so I can watch myself getting fucked by your boyfriend.

"Better than a mirror," he added, inching back and leaving Billy nowhere to go but to drop down on to his elbows. He was dazed like he'd just been knocked flat by Cassie sized up to match the Hulk, and Tony fucking Stark's voice purring at him telling him to get with the program and wiggle out of his pants only ended up making him forget how his fingers worked. Plus he really didn't think Teddy would do it, shiftsex wasn't something they did outside of some experimenting with different er, sizes, but Teddy's eyes changed first in colour then in shape, and in two seconds flat, Billy found himself in the middle of a Stark sandwich.

He was totally going to die of a coronary before he could legally buy booze.

Tony sized up Teddy as Teddy dropped right onto Billy's lap as if he'd taken on some of Tony's attitude along with the looks. The clothes he'd worn to the party fit more loosely now, the shirt hanging attractively off his shoulder and Billy flopped fully onto his back when Teddy snugly straddled his hips.

"Not bad," Tony said from somewhere to Billy's left. "Not bad at all. Now how about you show me how I kiss?"

"I'm gonna die," Billy breathed, rewarded by a sudden rush of colour back into Teddy's cheeks. Coupled with his chagrined expression, he made Tony's face look...adorable.

The mattress dipped abruptly at Billy's side and then Tony was there putting his fingers under Teddy's chin. "That's making eyes at your boyfriend, not kissing me," he said, leaning forward on his knees to claim Teddy's attention and take the kiss.

It was wet, lewd, and a completely awesome thing to watch. Teddy shifted, rocking against the erection stiff in Billy's shorts, and Tony was murmuring little words of encouragement against Teddy's mouth. "Take his dick out, would you?" Tony said, and Billy's hands bumped into Teddy's as both of them rushed to do exactly what Tony had told them. "One at a time, boys."

Tony whistled sharply as he watched his double ease Billy's shorts down and again when Billy helped free Teddy's dick from his pants. That hadn't shifted shape, and boy that felt a little awkward, more so when Tony piped in with, "Guess there's always room for improvement."

"Sorry, Mr. Stark, I've never seen a picture of you with all your clothes off," Teddy said. He rubbed at the back of his neck and chewed at his lip. Billy tried to reconcile this latest burst of adorableness with the arch expression on the real Tony's face and predictably failed.

"Miracles happen," Tony said. "And you can call me by my first name unless you want to play teacher." He slid his hands over the waist of his pants, thumbs hooking under the fabric, and the sudden cocky slant of his mouth made Billy jerk even before he shoved them down and gave them both a look at the real deal. Billy had seen pictures, and even the grainy sex tape, but this, holy shit, this was actually happening.

"Better?" Teddy asked, and Billy's gaze leapt from one to the other. If he didn't know Teddy so well, he would've been hard pressed to tell who was the real Tony Stark.

He almost shot his load when Tony reached out and wrapped his hand around Teddy's cock. "Better," Tony decreed, giving it a couple loving strokes before sitting back on his heels and digging around in the tangle of his slacks. A couple seconds later, he was slapping a condom and a pack of lube onto Billy's chest. "Get to it, kid."

This time Billy's fingers didn't fail him. He probably broke a world record for fastest application of a condom, and all that practice he and Teddy had gotten sneaking a quick fuck here and there earned them a murmur of appreciation as Billy slicked himself up and Teddy eased straight down onto his cock.

"Can't build a robot for that," Tony said, as Teddy shifted and let Billy fuck up into him sweet and easy. "Well, you know what I mean."

Billy's world went a little topsy-turvy after that. Usually he was a little more energetic but Teddy was doing a lot of the work, and Tony was helping with his mouth in more ways than one. A whole lot more ways than one. After one last string of dirty encouragement Tony just wriggled down and started sucking Teddy off, and Billy's hand went straight for a handful of Tony's hair.

"Is that a stop, sweetheart?" Tony asked, his mouth slipping off Teddy's cock but waiting poised to suck him right back down again. God, Tony really did want to fuck himself bad. Not that most guys didn't probably think about it, but....

Billy coughed, and managed a weak, "No."

"Then how about you yank a little harder and show me what you've got."

He did, and stupidly he'd thought Tony couldn't get any more into it. A loud moan and a hand running up his thigh set him straight. Slippery fingers groped around the base of his dick while Teddy was grinding down, his mouth slack with pleasure, and that was there the illusion couldn't keep up. Even in the sharp angles of Tony's face, the neat cut of his goatee, and the perfect tousle of his hair, Teddy was unmistakable. Billy could read him easily, knew the soft sounds he made when he was about to come, and with only the tiniest bit of guilt he held Tony in place to get a mouth full of it.

He blew his own load watching the bob of Tony's throat as he swallowed every last drop and kept sucking like he expected more. After what felt like minutes, Tony pulled away, stayed on his knees and finished himself off straight onto the bed.

"Now I actually mean thanks for the rescue," Tony said, his voice a little rough. He dropped onto the scatter of the sheets, one arm flung out like he knew exactly the sort of debauched picture he made. "Never let anyone tell you that Cap won't leave a man behind."

Billy tried to wrap his head around whether or not Tony was joking, he really did, but then Teddy was climbing off him and all Billy could manage was a feeble noise.

The feeble noise returned when still wearing Tony's face, Teddy stretched and said, "Thanks for the star fuck."

"Always happy to add a notch or two to someone's bedpost," Tony replied. "I'm a generous guy like that."

Before Teddy shifted back, his mouth twisted into a mirror image of the smirk sitting on Tony's just long enough for it to burn its way into Billy's brain.

That sex tape was never going to be the same.



Date: 2010-02-02 10:58 pm (UTC)
blue_soaring: (tony // can't hear you)
From: [personal profile] blue_soaring
My glee, it is epic. EPIC. EPIC.

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